I wear glasses whenever I don’t wear my contact lenses! My vision is sharp thanks to those inventions of science & lifestyle modifying research.
I blame my eyes and myopia only when my dreams don’t come true . – “Must have seen something else” – I try to save myself because I don’t wear glasses or lenses when I sleep. 😉
There is no such event in my life which I call “unhappy memory” and blame my myopia , except one. Millions of years ago, when I was little immature and not a “so called” grown up, it happened.
It was that time when my attention was mainly on my career and personal life in only one world- THE REAL WORLD. I was present on Orkut but used to value real friendship more.
And then Facebook and twitter happened. Suddenly , every birthday cake on Facebook looked more tasty ; every promotion party picture on Facebook made the REAL world a not-so-happy-place-anymore. 😉
A common friend of mine and husband used to post statuses- very good ones, showcasing her personal life. I soon became a fan of her. Lets call her just “She”.
During that time , someone at office asked me “Who is your role model?”. I took her name.
I never met her till then, but was supposed to meet in a year.
She was 15 to 18 years older than me ( Okay, folks! Age is just a number. Nothing in life depends on it.); her pictures showed celebration of life, contentment; her statuses showed many things that I wanted to be & have ,18 years ahead . For example ,a confident & compassionate career woman with happy family, happier friends – everything picture perfect!
Once during a long drive, my husband said ,” Life happens in silence. Don’t you think she does too much self-talk? ” – I did not agree with my husband , that day.
Fast forward to next 6 months since I met her for the first time. I had several face to face interactions from that time.
I found that she stays mostly on social networking sites and neglects her career. That’s fine. “ I am not here to judge her or anyone.” – I thought.
She cribs. She gets jealous of every other hard working better performers. That’s fine too.
She does not appreciate achievers ; and does not invest time to modify her own work performance.
She talks about painful pasts ; but appears “fake” with all of them who caused that pain. She is very good to people on face and exactly opposite behind.
Several times, she criticizes people who caused her pain while writing nice “I miss you” stories about them on Facebook – both at the same time.
She judges every other person. She forgives hardly. But She puts beautiful quotes on Facebook, every other day.
She stays in the past, most of the times; and makes quite a miserable present for everyone around her.
She gets upset if her followers ( for example : I ) *like* people who she does not like in real life.
She also talks many things about women empowerment ,feminism, women liberation etc on Facebook. Those things are very close to my heart. I support women liberation , I believe in “gender equality”. Her Facebook statuses about those topics were most important reasons to call her my “role model”. But ,she hardly encouraged me to aspire more ( even though she knew I was her fan and I always loved my career.) , to work on those issue.
Months passed. And slowly, I found I was not attracted to her “super power” Facebook statuses anymore. I never liked hypocrite people.
Personal meetings with her became “heavy” too. I could not take her “baggage” anymore since she was so negative about everything . She was changing into anything but “role model”.
But, I stayed in touch , respected her , talked to her with compassion, until I came to know she judged me too. And once again, that judgment was not right and a bit harsh. I also realized I stopped liking her . And I could not be another hypocrite.
This thing happened millions of years ago.
I am not in touch with her anymore.
But, I hear from a few close friends that she has not changed , still . She still has many Facebook friends ; of course very few real ones. She still posts happy pictures , good quotes on Facebook. She still makes people look bad to make her look good!
I liked “clueless” , I read “Emma” too. Trust me , meeting a total “Monet” in real life is good. They help you chuckle & sigh, at the same time.
You may even feel that millions of years ago, you learned many lessons:
- You visit your eye doctor more frequently
- You come to know that jealousy, comparison do not serve any good in real life.
- You understand life is not ONLY about picture perfect posts on virtual world. REAL LIFE HAPPENS IN SILENCE .
- You also learn that letting go things is the best practice ( and sleeping them off too! 😉 ).
- Success & failures are just two sides of the same coin. Things happen! But it’s on us to decide what we want to be – “bitter” or “better” after a while.
- Being compassionate is the key to success and happiness.
- You end up wondering if there is any real hero or role model available in the world. We all have our flaws, short-comings.
- Some characters look good on stories , comics, biographies ,films. But, look at your parents, aunt, uncle,siblings, cousins – you love them for who they are ; they love you for who you are. I am sure there hides a “role model” in one of them!
On a side note ,Last year, someone asked me :” Who is your role model? Don’t say Steve Jobs. He’s very popular in your generation.“.
I thought and then said “ In personal life -my Mom. Career – Dad. ”
“Why not Marissa Mayer or Sheryl Sandberg? ” –
“I love her hairstyle and her TED talk .” – I ended with a smile!
You check other entries about “A TOTAL MONET ” here .