Mother’s Day

Mother's day

There’s a story behind everything. How a picture got on a wall. How a scar got on your face. Sometimes the stories are simple, and sometimes they are hard and heartbreaking. But behind all your stories is always your mother’s story, because hers is where yours begin.” ― Mitch Albom

I never celebrated Mother’s day. I never said to my mom how much I loved her. See we don’t talk love. We don’t express it in words. But ask me or her this question about our mutual love and understanding, we both can bring back a million memories and hours for the answer.

My mom never asked me to follow her footsteps. She wears Saree, keeps fast for her favorite God, and loves philosophy of spirituality. Not a single guest leaves her home without eating home cooked meal and a small souvenir for the family. My dad doesn’t eat out because  my mom brings the whole world within the four walls of her kitchen. “No food tastes better than what she cooks,” says my dad. She cooks with love. She tells me all her secret recipes and misses me every single time she cooks my favorite food.  She’s giving, selfless, thoughtful, and caring. I am not.

I didn’t become like her. Eating is not my favorite hobby, I skip my meals when I find something more attractive, books or movies or a discussion. I don’t like Saree and I am hardly religious. But like her, I adore human relations and I love cooking for close people. Like her I talk to plants, water them regularly and feed them. I treat them like living beings. “If you love plants, they love you back more than you imagined,” I remember my mom’ s lesson whenever I realize that truth.

She has long hair. She and I always liked my hair short. But each time I am home, she combs and oils my hair like I am still her five year old. A ritual that I miss often. Who says love has to be wordy!

I come from a family of strong-willed ladies, grandmothers, and mother-figures. During my childhood I believed my mom was some superwoman. She was not scared of anything or anyone. She could do anything, even magic. She fought with mean people, answered back when she felt something was wrongly said. And she was always logical. You cannot win an argument with her unless you are really right.

When I was just nine, I found two Nobel prize winner novels by contemporary authors in her bookshelf. She happily explained to me what Nobel prize meant. She has taught me how inner meanings of poems are so many times different from what we apparently understand. She must have read more than a thousand poems to me till now. We must have fought a hundred times over “meanings” of a song, or a story, or a drama, or a poem. She watched old award winning movies with me on Sundays. In simple language she discussed many difficult art house films with me. Her favorite genre has been life. Mine too. Now in thirties, I know why I am the way I am.

I love being my mom’s daughter. This is one of the best gifts, in my opinion. This realization. That when I see other moms, I remember the one I got, and I feel lucky to have known her well,  to be made of her flesh and blood and her soul-stirring food.

Facebook reminds me to wish my mom on Sunday, retail shops want me to gift her skincare products, handbags or those blingy jewelries to remember another Mother’s Day. I won’t do any of those, just like other years. But like every other day, I will pick up her call and listen to her concerned voice and silently feel fortunate to have someone like her in my life.

Even though she never expected me to be like her, some day I may just turn into her…. quite happily.

20 thoughts on “Mother’s Day

  1. What a wonderful post! Does your mom read your blog? If so, she just got a wordy Mother’s Day, anyways. 🙂 But I love how you’ve become like her in your own way, and how you celebrate your relationship without being commercial, how it isn’t a one-day-in-a-year thing for you. Absolutely beautiful!

    1. She doesn’t know that I make time for writing every once in a while! Though because of her my love for writing began decades ago. She doesn’t read this blog. That would have been pretentious, or she would have said,” Stop advertising me to world. I am just a normal human. ” She doesn’t believe in Mother’s day too. 🙂

      I know there are moms like her. This post was a tribute to all of them and their silent dedication. 🙂 Thank you very much for reading, Andrea.

    1. Totally agree, Arch. 🙂 I find writing a Facebook status for her or giving her gifts is completely unnecessary and pretentious. There are so many moms like my mom who love genuine togetherness, dining table conversations, a phone call and a listening ear. I’d like to give her those!

      Thank you so much for reading, Arch. 🙂

  2. What a lovely, practical, yet also strangely spiritual, post about your mother. Actions speak louder than words (and commercialism) and she has shown you so much. You’re very fortunate and cards and gifts would be superfluous.

    1. My mother doesn’t believe in commercial celebratory days- father’s days, mother’s days, daughter’s days! Once I wished her on Mother’s Day, but she said she never liked celebrating it. “Greetings cards and gifts on such days make me wonder if those were the reasons for the motherhood,” She said.
      I never forget her birthday and anniversary- two important dates of our lives. Her birthday is the true mother’s day for me.
      Like you mentioned, “Actions speak louder than words (and commercialism)”- I try to remember that!
      Thank you so much for reading, Pauleen.

  3. Beautiful tribute. Its amazing how she is always there when we need her, quiet and silent like the air but always around us.

    Happy mother’s day!!

    1. So true, Sampada. She is like the air, omnipresent. Thank you so much for reading. 🙂
      A belated happy mother’s day! Hope you celebrated. 🙂

  4. I love being my Mom’s son! 🙂 And I told her that in a today phone conversation (she lives several hours to the East, by plane). This is a lovely, warm felt post.

    1. You did the right thing, Eric. 🙂 If I tell my mom this ( that I love being her daughter on our phone conversation), she will visit me with lots of fruits, snacks and a thermometer. As long as I’m arguing or questioning her logic, I am perfectly healthy and fit in her book of thoughts. 😀
      Thank you so much for reading, Eric. 🙂

  5. These beautiful words and thoughts are all that any mother ever wants for ‘Mother’s Day,’ Archita, celebrated formally or not. Your love shines through.

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