As my menstrual cycle approaches its painful conclusion every month, I find myself navigating the highest of highs and the lowest of lows.
I often laugh uncontrollably, only to start crying in the same breath. Sometimes, the tears come unexpectedly while I’m watching a movie or listening to a song. Just the other day, I broke down over a childhood incident where I was bullied—something that happened nearly three decades ago.
And these aren’t just gentle tears; they sting.
Yet, in this heightened emotional state, I also find myself experiencing bursts of unexpected joy. I’ll jump with excitement at the sight of a sapling breaking through the soil or feel overwhelming happiness when I see my cat sleeping in an odd position. I feel brave but anxious, hopeful yet panicked.
It is really as if all the characters from Inside Out have come to party inside my head.
After some research, I’ve narrowed the reason for these interesting experiences down to two possibilities: either the Pseudobulbar affect or plain old PMDD. Whatever the cause, it makes me feel equal parts joyful and enraged.
Fingers in symphony 